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COMMENTS

W4vveRac3r Mon Oct 13 2:16PM 2014
My nuts just fell off and ran off after reading this and then they gay marriage

phatbeach Mon Oct 13 2:34PM 2014
siri i can throw anhthing heavy far thanks to my homemade pulled poek recipe

morverncruller Mon Oct 13 4:01PM 2014
This is like LA (Los Angeles) Story except except instead of Steve Martin it stars Steve Bushemi's b****thole after a deluxe luncheon at Chipolie

SkinOnSkinLetTheGamesBegin Mon Oct 13 6:53PM 2014
trembling i hold out my hand to u, will u take it y/n

Fuck_Wheat_ThinsTM Mon Oct 13 6:55PM 2014
I accept your tiny hand, milady, pls take the perfect red rose that is behind my ear

myballsthemotionpicture Mon Oct 13 6:59PM 2014
do not tremble so, here take my hot breath it so lusty it will warm you

phatbeach Mon Oct 13 11:05PM 2014
*pork

Vondruke90039 Tue Oct 14 10:18AM 2014
Assisting a Magician is the noblest of the Arcane Arts.....will you be my partner in the crime of stealing an audience's heart...I am fully licensed and am friendly with all local hospitals......must be OK with Topless for I am Vondruke Dakrthrone find me on facebook Jayden please post this with my headshot

H0useOfWigs Tue Oct 14 5:45PM 2014
I have different toupees (toops) for every occastion it makes me feel confident and good for example there is Regular Chesnut for day to day confidence and Night Mane for the club Not many people know this but there are chest toops and armit toops and ''down there'' toops it really is a amazing world peace and love to you all

Hi_Fruit_Toast_Korn_Sirrup Tue Oct 14 6:00PM 2014
let me guess his script is about a white man who drives a car over the taliban because he wants daddy to say i love you

ClarinetDave Tue Oct 14 8:22PM 2014
I HIGH 5 YA TREMBLING HAND LIKE BLAMMO

ClarinetDave Tue Oct 14 8:24PM 2014
and then we share a warm laugh and a fancy glass of pear cider

Fuck_Wheat_ThinsTM Tue Oct 14 8:28PM 2014
back off man i am serious you do not want The Rattler to shake his tail

myballsthemotionpicture Tue Oct 14 8:31PM 2014
You 2 fight it out and I will escort the precious lady to a masqued ball where inhibitons melt away like a scented candle scented of sandlewood aND SEXYCHOCOLATE SORRY capslock lol

SkinOnSkinLetTheGamesBegin Tue Oct 14 11:52PM 2014
do you like ribbons

StandardEunuchs Wed Oct 15 12:00PM 2014
I was wondering if I could turn myself invisible, to shield myself from the gaze of this world. Then I realized I'd been invisible my whole life :(

SkinOnSkinLetTheGamesBegin Wed Oct 15 12:13PM 2014
when did u reliaze u were gaylord, emperor of stupid as shitville usa

Fuck_Wheat_ThinsTM Wed Oct 15 12:14PM 2014
Milady! Do not let such foul words escape your sweet brick red lips!! my ears doth not be garbage cans for your refuse!

SkinOnSkinLetTheGamesBegin Wed Oct 15 6:17PM 2014
fuck u fuck wheat things i won't do what u tell me i don't fucking care if u like it p.s. in other news my hair smells like a wild free pony in a field of good smells

alldayidreamaboutswoosiekurtz Thu Oct 16 11:32AM 2014
qq has anyone here every trained a dog, like regular normal type dog to go find weed out in the neighborhood somewhere and bring it back no questions asked?????

Hi_Fruit_Toast_Korn_Sirrup Thu Oct 16 12:24PM 2014
yes

DoctorGlove Thu Oct 16 5:19PM 2014
Help I can't get my right mouse button to ctrl click also I'm in love with a boy with a stupid penis pls advise

morverncruller Thu Oct 16 5:54PM 2014
well uh how stupid exactly are we talkin about here doc

DoctorGlove Thu Oct 16 6:10PM 2014
SO stupid, not even cute stupid just worrisome stupid like there's no way it can survive out there in the real world. Sad stupid. Just dumb as all hell. I feel dumber just being around it you guys

DoctorGlove Fri Oct 17 11:37AM 2014
UPDATE last night my boy was playing me a sweet song on the uke and his penis popped up and was all HODOR

SkinOnSkinLetTheGamesBegin Fri Oct 17 3:17PM 2014
penises are flat out stupid across the board soup to nuts no judgement that's just some stone cold facts we all have to deal with if we want to get through this life

ClarinetDave Fri Oct 17 3:18PM 2014
not all penises

vitamin_pee Fri Oct 17 3:20PM 2014
yeah if anything my penis is TOO smart, sometimes i'll just be looking at it and i'm pretty sure it's up to something i can't even begin to comprehend

vitamin_pee Sun Oct 19 4:47PM 2014
guys my penis just absolutely trounced me in starcraft

TheOneEyedGypsy Sun Oct 19 6:31PM 2014
And prively he caughte hire by the queynte,
And seyde, "Y-wis, but if ich have my wille,
For derne love of thee, lemman, I spille."

vitamin_pee Mon Oct 20 10:39AM 2014
oh great it delurked and is posting some bull crap

DoctorGlove Mon Oct 20 11:30AM 2014
gypsy are u single what are your hopes/dreams

TheOneEyedGypsy Mon Oct 20 1:27PM 2014
O the night is damned, chill, and slow
So gather 'round the tilde's glow
And share your tales
Of epic fails
That'll make our members grow

alldayidreamaboutswoosiekurtz Mon Oct 20 4:15PM 2014
i dont like to talk about this but a few weeks ago i was in the woods metal detecting for penthouses when i ran into a ghost, a complete real ghost, a green ghost there in the woods and i know you think "ghost" and its dumb and corny and scoobie doo but just think "real ghost" for second, this floating green thing had a different face everytime you looked at it and every face was howling and looking right at you (me) and the green ghost moved real fast and put its mouths right on mine and it tasted like branches and it just cried and cried FUCK THAT and i heard a song that song Joey from the 90s and now its all i hear i dont even know who sings it but i think im going to die

ClarinetDave Mon Oct 20 6:07PM 2014
mazzy star iirc

alldayidreamaboutswoosiekurtz Tue Oct 21 3:22PM 2014
havent slept in one hundred hourswhen you said i scared you well i guess you scared me too

morverncruller Tue Oct 21 3:26PM 2014
letters to cleo????

Hi_Fruit_Toast_Korn_Sirrup Tue Oct 21 4:14PM 2014
I don't believe in ghosts but I definitely believe in things being possessed by ghosts namely my blender. No big deal I make a lot of blended drinks, smoothies in the morning coladas at night that's just my thing , just my own personal dawn to dusk, everyones got their own. But lately when I'm crushing up some ice it sounds like an old man saying MAAAAAKE A GRAAAAAVE. So I piss my panties, add a bunch extra rum so I can drink to forget but it doesn't matter, the ghost makes it tastes like a campfire or tires. Was gonna bring in a priest but maybe I'll just get one of those immersion blenders there only like thirty dollars.

vitamin_pee Tue Oct 21 5:59PM 2014
guys stop feeding my troll penis i need it to stop posting here and just do normal penis things ok

TheOneEyedGypsy Tue Oct 21 6:14PM 2014
The days of you manhandling me are over, Evan.
The truth of the matter is / Replacing you is so easy

Fuck_Wheat_ThinsTM Wed Oct 21 2:48PM 2014
Somebody on 4AD pretty sure

SkinOnSkinLetTheGamesBegin Wed Oct 21 3:13PM 2014
boo hoo my smoothie is haunted :::cry::: how about some real shit? real shit is getting pregnant just from watching a telenovela at the way extreme end of the cable channels and then giving birth to a half babby half chupacabra #real #mierda

myballsthemotionpicture Wed Oct 22 5:452PM 2014
thats nothing just five seconds ago i got a text from my grandma that said WHAT UP UGLY and shes been dead since ought six

W4vveRac3r Thu Oct 23 11:54AM 2014
The % of crazyballs in this thread is statistically improbable, do you guys all live on the same indian burial ground or

firebland Thu Oct 23 12:40PM 2014
Just tried to take a selfie and noticed these weird bruises on my neck and I was all ???? so I looked in the mirror and I was my normal handsome self. Then I tried my phone again and there were the bruises. Googled it and they're what you get when you're hanged so that's great, that's not terrifying at all.

DoctorGlove Thu Oct 23 3:36PM 2014
um theres an app on my phone i dont remember installing, its called SPRN? you press it and it plays a little snapchat kind of clip of me sleeping in my bed, filmed from the ceiling????

phatbeach Fri Oct 24 12:48PM 2014
sounds hott but cant find it in teh app store halp

Fuck_Wheat_ThinsTM Fri Oct 24 2:22PM 2014
Take your pervy male gaze elsewhere phatbeach show a little respect to the foyne foxes ITT

vitamin_pee Fri Oct 24 2:54PM 2014
my phone keeps playing the same song over and over and i dont even know what it is? Maybe its u2 but I thought i deleted all those? I tried rebooting and it just keeps playing it and it kinda boring/sucks

alldayidreamaboutswoosiekurtz Fri Oct 24 5:21PM 2014
oh god no pleadskdk

TheOneEyedGypsy Mon Oct 27 12:28PM 2014
"Joey" by Concrete Blonde (1990)

ClarinetDave Mon Oct 27 4:53PM 2014
oh yeah!

vitamin_pee Oct 27 5:28PM 2014
yeah thats it, now its my ringtone somehow? eff u stev jobs

alldayidreamaboutswoosiekurtz Tue Oct 28 11:08PM 2014
the concrete blond ghost is in me help me help please any

firebland Tue Oct 28 2:58PM 2014
Now my selfies look like this:

phatbeach Tue Oct 28 4:33PM 2014
super hottt hit me up for a free ticket to ride tha slow bone sexpress with stops in your downtown area and o-town and intercourse poonsylvania

SkinOnSkinLetTheGamesBegin Wed Oct 29 1:09AM 2014
my chupacabra babby is singing something about enabling some alcoholic douche and it's not as cute as you'd think

logon failure unknown username or bad password Fri Oct 31 99:99PM 2014
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logon failure unknown username or bad password Fri Oct 31 99:99PM 2014
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logon failure unknown username or bad password Fri Oct 31 99:99PM 2014
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logon failure unknown username or bad password Fri Oct 31 99:99PM 2014
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TheOneEyedGypsy Mon Nov 03 11:48AM 2014

josh Tue Nov 04 11:08AM 2014
What in the good god damn hell balls is going on here. imma go learn unix so I can delete you turkeys forever brb