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18 Sept 22

Meetings for the Week of 18 September 2022

18 Sept 9-10:30 AM - Kibio and CC - Discussion meeting - 35 people

This is the 6th meeting for this group.

Regarding emotions. Imagine that you have a badly broken arm in a cast from shoulder to fingers. When the Doc removes the cast 3 months later, you gasp, "what happened to my arm, doc?” The arm has shriveled in size compared to the other arm. The muscles have atrophied due to lack of use. Excessive drinking over several months or years puts a cast over one's emotional management system, artifically propping up your emotions. It will recover, but just like the broken arm, it has weakend and will take special care and therapy beyond just removing the cast to fully recover. Quitting drinking is just removing the cast!

Things that were talked about

1. . Dealing with conflict with close friends (Emotional Upsets) - They will only deal with me when I'm not on a relapse.
2. . Guikde to Rational Living - Albert Ellis (pg 129)
3. . I have the the power to choose - can be liberating and an onus
4. . UOA and respecting others'boundaries
5. . DIBS/DUBS
6. . Hula Hoop
7. . Anger can be due to trying to control the uncontrollable.
8. . Have a time out for an hour or so and then text back and say what I think happened
9. . How to deal with gaslighting?
10. . Those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter
11. . Being opens means I feel like I don't have to hind in the shame - gratitude for this.
12. . I can do what I can with what I have where I am.
13. . Acceptance I'm not just throwing my hands up and letting it pass. Acceptance is the starting point. When I get to Acceptance, I can then start the process of a plan on what I want to do, in a way in line with my values.

Unconditional Life Acceptance - lots of things we used to have control over we don't any longer. This is going to be harder as I get older

18 Sept 7-8:30PM - Bobbie and Hatrick beginners meeting - 60 participants This is week 5. Coping with Urges

Bobbe is where indistractable came from.

Do the best you can until you know better Then when you know better, do better

Cope with urges - recognize ideas and thoughts and work past them.

Automatic negative thoughts. To fix Record - Recognize - Replace

Do more word exchanges - statement exchanges - emotional vocabulary exchanges

19 Sept 2022 - 7:30-9AM Hatrick and Kibs 38 people Open your eyes, look within, Are you satisfied with the life you are living? - Bob Marley - Today's topic

Smart Recover for Family and Friends (maybe get this after a year?)

We do not find the meaning of life by ourselves alone - we find it with another.

Need to work on securing a satisfying lifestyle.

Ian Tucker - Your simple path book - 10 steps for a better life - Ian Tucker's homepage: https://www.iantucker.co.uk

Our old behaviors were really time consuming (Planning, buying, financing, doing, hiding/lying, denying, recovery (hangover)

How can I reinvest that amount of time some place else.

Lead an Authentic Life.

Put the past in the past - Cherish the present - Focus on the future